Dr. Bordelon's Introduction to Poetry

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Essay Revision
Organization | Introductions | Making Arguments | Context

Organization
Organization guides readers through your essay, transforming the rich -- but jumbled -- array of thoughts and arguments in your head into a logical flow that another person can follow and nod along with as they read.

Look for the following when revising to clarify your organization:

  • Clear thesis and divisions
  • Clear topic sentences with repetition of division word AND thesis (see below for example)
  • Repetition of division word within paragraph
    • You could also develop list of synonyms connected to division work. For instance, in a paragraph discussing an oppressive society, you could use words like suppress, control, hold back, etc. to keep readers focused on your main point.
  • Break divisions into two paragraphs?

Below you'll find a sample thesis statement and topic sentences from a student essay.

Thesis/division Statement
This sonnet suggests that love is longing through of permanence, time, and loss.

For the thesis and divisions above, topic sentences such as those below would be used to set up paragraphs

Topic sentence for division #1
The permanence of love evokes a sense of longing in "Shall I Compare Thee."

Topic sentence for division #2
In addition to permanence, the sense of time passing creates the longing so typical of lovers.

Topic sentence for division #3
This longing is also connected to the possibility of loss.

Thesis
“I shall forget you presently my dear” portrays love as a facade for lust through the use of physical imagery, references to time, and a dismissive tone.

Topic Sentence Division 1
Physical imagery in “I shall forget" hails biology over emotion, illustrating the primacy of lust.

Topic Sentence Division 2
Millay's focus on brevity points to the fleeting nature of lust.

Topic Sentence Division 3
“I shall forget” utilizes a dismissive tone to portray love as a facade.

Note in each of these topic sentences how there is a word or phrase that refers directly back to the division. This kind of repetition is a reader's friend: it guides them through your thinking so they can concentrate on how well you explain/prove your point. It also helps you, the writer, out by reminding you to make your points concise and to stay focused on individual ideas.

To check your organization, copy out your thesis/division and the first sentence of each body paragraph. Can you follow the argument as clearly as in the example noted above? If not, begin revising.

This kind of organization results in essays that prove your point: which is the goal of argumentative writing . . . and should be your goal for this essay.


Titles/Introductions

In academic writing, colons are often used in titles to separate a "catchy" title from a more specific one. See below for an example

What is it Good For?: Questioning War in "The End and the Beginning"

This allows you to be creative yet clearly state the subject of your essay.

Introductions

If the purpose of an introduction is to engage the reader and provide an overview of your topic, and the purpose of your rough draft was to get your thoughts down, it's probably time to rewrite your introduction. Try the following suggestions -- and remember that in literary essays, you should mention the authors and titles you'll be covering.

  • analogy
  • contemporary/historical events
  • explain focus of essay
  • personal connection
Let's take a look at some samples

Example 1
“In a Station of the Metro”
From Petals to Apparitions

What constitutes poetry? Is a poem merely lines composed and arranged in rhyme schemes and stanzas? If so, how many stanzas, and how many lines? Students who ask these questions may look at “In a Station of the Metro” by Ezra Pound and say “Well, I may not know what poetry is, but I know it is not that.” They are wrong.  Pound's poem is both a a wonderful example of  poetry and a statement on modern life.  "Station" uses its short length, undertones of loss, and corruption of a natural image to depict the negative influences of modern, urban life.

Example 2
Poetry is viewed as a rather classical form of artistic expression.  Poetry brings to mind a particular set of preconceived ideas.  This classic image of poetry is one that contains short lines, stanzas, and the text centered on the page.  The preconceived idea of poetry is one containing strict rhyme schemes, structures, and rhythms.  Poetry for many does not exist outside this image.  Classical poetry dates back to the hymns and psalms of the bible.  This poetry has traditional themes of picturesque love and the wonder of nature.  These ideals make the appearance of poetry that strays from this image hard to swallow for the traditionalists.  Every innovator behind a movement of change has become the brunt of backlash but in due time becomes bestowed with praise.

E.  E.  Cummings is a modernist poet who has been heavily inspired by the dismantled shapes of cubist paintings, the grotesque images of Amy Lowell, and the nonconformist syntax of Stein (Christensen).  Cummings, as a part of the modernist movement, is reacting to post-war America and in this reaction he presents certain ideals.  These ideals range from an overwhelming sense of disillusion, the dark fears of humanity, and increasing introspection (Modernism).   Cummings has flirted with Dadaist ideals and began his innovation of poetry in the 1920's.  Cummings says the “destruction of traditional values is a necessary step toward any type of creation” (Ruiz).  He is radical in his sexual descriptions, typography, syntax and punctuation.  His innovation lies in his destruction of tradition in classical poetry in order to bring forth his unconventional style.

Example 3

Is god just another vehicle for the people who run the world to drive their agendas?  God seems to be the ‘go to’ answer that politicians use when they want to sell something to the public.  Take what George W. Bush said, “I'm driven with a mission from God. God would tell me, George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan. And I did, and then God would tell me, George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq. . .. And I did.”  (Qtd. In Kamen).  How godlike of President Bush to avenge the victims of 9/11 by attacking the wrong country, twice.

God is not just a way for power hungry neo-fundamentalist politicians to drive policy, he is a marketing tool created by some early advertising firm, on some early version of Madison Avenue, to get donations and sell funny hats.  Organized religions seemed to have evolved to take advantage of this character’s marketability.  This marketability has been used to sell everything from bullets, bombs, and hatred towards others who do not fit in the hegemony.  It has encouraged people to fear the ‘others’ in society; to punish those who do not follow their orthodox lifestyle.  It seems unlikely that if there was a god he would look brightly on organized religion.  As different sects of the same religion commit genocide and war crimes against each other, would he really be smiling down on anybody?  Would he praise a Pope for not wearing ruby encrusted slippers while millions of children starve, or was that ‘fashion statement’ long overdue?  How would their mascot, god, look on the Pope living in a gilded mansion surrounded by priceless pieces of art, taking donations from the elderly and poor?    How would he feel about a pope who preaches about what type of sex is appropriate while working to hide the pedophilia that has plagued his church? 

It seems like only the intellectual and artistic class can see through this ruse.  They are a class of people who are able to see through the propagated myths put out by the church through their works of art and literature.  John Lennon’s “God,” Stephen Crane’s “The Open Boat,” and Pearl Jam’s “Mind Your Manners” question god and organized religion.  There are also many poets that question the existence of god.  One poet who does this is William Blake.  In “The Tyger,” Blake’s speaker asks questions about the existence of tigers and lambs; the speaker questions how the two species could be created by the same creator, and what that creator’s motivations might be.  Although some readers interpret Blake’s poetry as devoutly religious, it really is against religion.  Blake raises doubt in “The Tyger” by having his speakers question religion through ambiguity in pronouns, choice of words, and god’s role in evil. 

Example 4 -- Different course, interesting work

Let's look at a before and after:

Rough Draft Intro

Currently there are many resources offered in America to those coping with a personal or interpersonal problem. The degree of stress varies from person to person which determines what form of management is needed. A CEO of a large corporation, for example carries a great deal of weight on their shoulders. The company has high expectations of a person in this position and the responsibility level is incredible. Having such responsibility elevates the level of stress and possibly the need for regular counseling. Since America offers many forms of support, a person with a high degree of stress has the ability to satisfy this lifestyle and find relief. On the other end of the spectrum a college student can feel stressed over a simple writing assignment. Having low self-esteem, the student is doubtful they have the ability to achieve the goal and often will worry about succeeding. With the need for guidance the student can attend a few meetings with a writing center, offered by the college, and accomplish the goal. These examples are a small fraction of how stress and other emotions linked to stress can be manages. Tim O’Brien, author of The Things They Carried, illustrates how these options were unavailable to the American soldiers fighting in the Vietnam War. The men of Alpha Company were exposed to conditions that affected them both mentally and physically, which heightened the level of their own uncertainties. The men were forced to rely on their own creativity in order to survive from day to day. The novel illustrates how they coped with the pressures of war by carrying personal things, retaliating against the enemy and humor.

Revision

Americans have many resources to cope with personal or interpersonal problems. A quick web search will call up counselors and support groups for all kinds of griefs. I used to scoff at such programs until I was faced with the sudden death of my husband. The overwhelming feeling of loneliness was impossible to overcome: I felt numb. After trying to manage my sorrow alone, a friend suggested a bereavement group, and I reluctantly signed up to attend a local session. Surprisingly, Walking into a room filled with people that shared these depressing emotions, was comforting, in a morbid sort of way. After listening to others describe their experience I felt less lonely. There is comfort knowing that a person is not alone in the battle to find peace within. I began to realize the importance of developing coping mechanism to traumatic events.  Unfortunately, not everyone can get to a therapy group.  For instance, the soldiers in Tim O’Brien's The Things They Carried illustrate what can happen to soldiers who don't have the option of therapy sessions. The men of Alpha Company were exposed to conditions that affected them both mentally and physically and  heightened their own insecurities. The men were forced to rely on their own creativity in order to survive from day to day. The novel illustrates how they coped with the pressures of war by carrying personal things, retaliating against the enemy, and humor.


Example 5 -- Different Course
The American Dream – the notion that, through hard work, a better standard of living can be given to subsequent generations – is comforting, and the influx of immigrants since the spread of this ideal has lent legitimacy to this self-proclamation. However the sad fact is that capitalism, a decidedly democratic economic model "characterized by private ownership of the means of production" (Kendall 427), has led to an expansive gap between the rich few and the impoverished many. Those that owned the factories and offices could also be said to have owned their employees as well, dictating everything from hours and pay to working conditions. This did not take long to establish, either, and as early as 1876 an assembled "Workingmen’s party" in Illinois wrote that the budding capitalist system had "allowed the capitalists, as a class, to appropriate annually 5/6 of the entire production of the country" (Zinn 244-5).

This notion would likely incite the working classes to revolt were it not tethered to the romantically attainable-sounding dream, however American authors have adeptly painted the pitfalls of capitalism and called attention to its shortcomings for years. Both the prose of Rebecca Harding Davis and the poetry of E.A. Robinson offer pointed critiques of this American economic model. They note its oppressive nature, its responsibility for a metaphorical death of the individual, and the emptiness of its fabled monetary excesses.


Making Arguments

Parts of a Body Paragraph

  1. Topic Sentence
  2. Framing
  3. Evidence
  4. Explanation (repetition is your friend) -- see How to Make Arguments below for additional suggestions.
  5. Closing
Example 1
Its permanence is another reason a tattoo works as a symbol for love.  Most Americans believe love can only be achieved after an extensive amount of time committed monogamously to a mate. Much like a personnel director going through a pile of resumes, dating is the time for sorting out applicants and rejecting those whose credentials do not meet current wants and needs and shows no potential for growth, not unlike a job application. Tattoos require the same careful consideration and commitment.  In“First Poem for You,” the speaker compares the permanency of their partner’s tattoos to the commitment of a relationship. To the speaker, the longevity of a tattoo is “terrifying” because it stays on someone’s skin until they’re “seared to ashes,” and their partner’s in particular could potentially outlive whatever is between them (13, 11). The speaker ends the poem tracing over the tattoos, “trying” (14) to link their permanency with love.

Example 2
The calming natural imagery in Li Po's poetry conveys a sense of peace and serenity. When stressed, people are often advised to imagine a calm and peaceful scene.  Instead of the hustle and bustle of urban or village life, most people turn to visions of nature.  In "The Solitude of Night," the speaker, recalling a night of drunken revelry, awakens with "blown flowers" on his "lap" (3).  The softness and delicacy of flower petals, which had fallen but not awakened him, contrast with the apparently raucous "wine party" (today this would be a kegger) which opens the poem (1).  Evoking the serenity of languid summer days, the flowers shift the attention of the reader from people -- the party -- to nature.  Instead of celebrating the camaraderie of civilization, the poem turns to natural solitude, a "river" and "moonlight," as the setting for a contemplative life (7). The emphasis on the natural world in “The Solitude” suggests that while parties were a part of Chinese life, nature played the dominant role in the society.

Example 3
Thesis: “The Tally Stick,” by Jarold Ramsey, embodies comfortable love through time symbolism, nature, and marriage.

The images of time passing suggests that the speaker’s relationship has evolved into a comfortable love. Time is the key element of comfortable love.  It cannot be achieved on the first date or the first month, sometimes not even the first year.  It can take years of being with someone to know everything about them from how they take their coffee to how they are uneasy with the infinite stretch of the universe.  The speaker’s relationship has undoubtedly lasted long enough to fall into comfortable love.  The tally stick is “whittled nearly end to end,” suggesting that they lived a whole life together (lines 20). The stick is as intricately carved as “scrimshaw,” which means that many years and many shared events, need to have occurred (4). Instead of the passion of initial love, the stick records them speaking "of ordinary matters" (line 26).  Even the “polish” of the stick, the slickness and sheen of the wood from long handling, is a record of their shared love. The stick feels good in their hands; it fits them -- just like their love it is comfortable.  Rather than a stocky scrapbook filled with glossy photos of first dates, bad haircuts, and failed trends of years past, the etchings in the tally stick evokes the decades and gentle satisfaction of their relationship. 

How to Make Arguments

Remember that quotes do not explain themselves: it's your job as the writer to make your case by providing the reasoning behind your decision to include a particular quote.

  • Provide context to set up your quotes
  • Look at the following aspects of the quote
    • Figurative language (metaphor, symbol)
    • Characterization (psychological motivations of a character)
      Explain how either of these (or both) support your reading of a quote and/or the point you're making in the paragraph.
  • Focus on explaining how your quote proves your point – talk out the significance of your quote, explaining how and why it proves your point by using
    • Analogies
    • "If . . . then" sentence patterns
    • Historical Connections
    • Contrast or comparison
    • Definitions of word
    • Try using a verb from the following list to shift into argument

agree
argue
believe
charge
claim
comment

conclude
consider
criticize
declare
describe
define

discover
emphasize
explain
feels
illustrate
imply

indicate
reinforce
reveals
shows
suggests
supports

Sample sentences which follow these patterns include

This ____ suggests that _______
They indicate the ____
This emphasis on finding ______ suggests that ___________
Connected to this ____ is the notion _______.
By explaining _____, the _______ is reinforced/clarified/revealed.
The connotations of ____ suggest/illustrates/reveals that _______.
The literary critic ____ argues that this _____ is crucial. He/she writes that ___
Supporting this idea of the war as an oppressive force, the narrator adds __________
The description reinforces the idea that ______.

Note how these sentences often refer back to a point and then use a verb from the list to advance and build an argument. The verbs from the list encourage you to ask a "how" or "why" question, which often leads to an argument.

Analogies

Consider how the following analogies help make an idea/argument clearer. 

Rather than a stocky scrapbook filled with glossy photos of first dates, bad haircuts, and failed trends of years past, the etchings in the tally stick evokes the decades and gentle satisfaction of their relationship. 

 Much like a personnel director going through a pile of resumes, dating is the time for sorting out applicants and rejecting those whose credentials do not meet current wants and needs and shows no potential for growth, not unlike a job application.

Context

This serves two purposes: 1) it sets up your point/argument by telling the reader why you're bringing up a particular source or quote, and 2) it gives the reader information to help identify the speaker or place the speaker or example in the given work. For example, a quote from Catullus' "Lesbia, Let Us Live Only for Loving" could be introduced in the following manner:

The speaker’s relationship has undoubtedly lasted long enough to fall into comfortable love.  The tally stick is “whittled nearly end to end,” suggesting that they lived a whole life together (lines 20).

Instead of celebrating the camaraderie of civilization, the poem turns to natural solitude, a "river" and "moonlight," as the setting for a contemplative life (7).

As an aristocratic Roman, Catullus was well aware of the power of money.  Thus he aligns it with love by using its language, "penny," "bankrupt," and "assets," to convey his disdain for financial capital over the charms of his lover (2, 11).

Context helps readers 1) by making the reader think "Oh yeah, now I remember that part" and 2) by letting readers better understand (and thus agree with) your argument by framing it in a manner so they can understand it. Here, it's clear that the writer wants to accentuate the idea of the importance of money and connect it to the strength of Catullus’ feelings toward Lesbia. The sentence leading up to the quote does this by planting the word "aristocratic" and “money” in the reader's mind, which is then reflected in the quotes.  By setting up your example so clearly, your argument flows logically from example to the explanation, leaving the reader with a satisfied "Ahhh" as opposed to a befuddled "huh?"


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© David Bordelon 2015