Sample Writer's Notes for essay #1
Archibold #1 / Archibold #2 / Moore #1
MY COMMENTS IN ALL CAPS.
Archibold, Randal C. "What Kind Of Education Is Adequate? It Depends." New York Times, 14 January 2001:
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| 1.33. ProQuest. Ocean County Library. 2008
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GREAT START
PROQUEST: FOR THE CORRECT METHOD OF CITING THIS SOURCE, FOLLOW THIS EXAMPLE FROM THE <http://lib.ocean.edu/the_source> CITING SOURCES SITE
Archibold, Randal C. "What Kind of Education is Adequate? It Depends." New York Times 14 January 2001, late ed. Sec. 1: 33. Proquest. Web. 9 August 2004.<<<THIS LAST DATE IS WHENEVER YOU ACCESSED IT]]
FOR A DESCRIPTION OF HOW TO SET UP AN ENTRY LIKE THIS, GO TO THE SITE, MLA AND NEW YORK TIMES. CLICK ON THE FIRST LINE FOR A POP WINDOW THAT EXPLAINS THE CITATION
Questions: For each question below, be sure to take careful notes, using quotation marks if ANY words from the original are used and to note page numbers for both quoted and summarized information. See Annotating (36) for more detail.
What does this essay identify as problems in American education?
Although critics have various intake on what "a sound, basic education" values, most agree on one sense that "many people are not getting one." (Archibold, 2 <<<GOOD JOB OF MIXING QUOTES WITH SUMMARY. NO PAGE NUMBER NEEDED HERE (HTML SOURCE) ) In addition, financing in New York State 's public schools continue to be an issue, "depriv[ing] students in New York City of their constitutional right to a sound, basic education." (Archibold, 2) Furthermore, in the example of jury service, critics fathom that " New York City 's public schools do not necessarily equip students to be able to achieve" the critical thinking and reasoning that is necessary in jury duty today. The emphasis critics impose the most for the downfall in American education is the inability of "students [to master] basic skills." (Archibold, 2) Students today do not possess the "ability" to solve "complex operations" and analyze engaging problems. (Archibold, 3) Our generation rely heavily on the usage of advanced technology, such as computers, and while computers have significant advantages in our society, it "can [also] create the appearance of a good statistical argument when it is not an argument at all. . . " (Archibold, 2)
What does this essay suggest American education should focus on?
Randall C. Archibold repeatedly suggests that American education should focus on "critical reasoning and the ability to form judgments and opinions independently. . . " (Archibold, 2) Instead of abusing our minds like machines and "cramming" our brain with countless information, the critics in the essay wants students to open up their thinking caps and embrace the "love" for learning, by "free[ing] the mind and the heart." (Archibold, 3) Scholars also urge students to earn "respect for others and for themselves" so that as "graduates, [they can] go forth with confidence, compassion and commitment so they can compete in a lot of areas." (Archibold, 3) While education and good grades are crucial aspects in the American school system, students should also possess inner strengths such as perseverance, ambitiousness and good morals, which are qualities that are a definite plus in any career .<<<GOOD JOB OF NOT MARKING THIS A ARCHIBOLD'S IDEAS. IF THIS WAS A SUMMARY OF ARCHIBOLD'S IDEAS, YOU WOULD END WITH HIS NAME IN PARENTHESIS.
GOOD START HERE -- MORE SPECIFICS FOR THIS QUESTION WOULD HELP (FOCUS OF THIS ESSAY IS CURRICULUM)
How does this essay suggest American education could be improved?
As Dr. Sobol at Columbia lays out: "You need to train the intelligence more than was the case in an agrarian society. We don't clear forests and lay railroad track. We perform complex operations on a computer. You could be comfortable with a lower standard in that older world of my father and grandfather's time. You can't be comfortable with that now in my time." (Archibold, 3)<<<USE (QTD. IN ARCHIBOLD) TO LET READERS KNOW THAT WHILE SOBOL SAID IT, YOU FOUND IT IN ARCHIBOLD. Facts and information are "grow[ing] more complex" and students must keep training their minds to keep up with the "demand. . . to sort through information and make sound judgments." (Archibold, 2) Additionally, education can also be improved by "rais[ing] school standards" and stressing students "to think critically." (Archibold, 3)
Connections to previous readings
Archibold makes many similar arguments in his essay as Friedman does in his work. Archibold "emphasize the classics, language, expression" (Archibold, 3) while Friedman states that "the ones who flourish the most will be those who develop the best broad- based education system, to have the most people doing and designing the most things we can't even imagine today" (Friedman, 2) Both writers suggest the importance of critical thinking and innovation, and using our minds as tools to develop originative work. EXCELLENT WORK HERE
Vivid examples/quotes/statistics in this reading
". . . the jury is in some respects an anti-elitist institution where life experience and practical intelligence can be more important than formal education. Nonetheless, jurors may be called on to decide complex matters that require the verbal, reasoning, math, science and socialization skills that should be imparted in public schools." (Archibold, 2) "A survey of 450 employers. . . found that only 10 percent of respondents thought a high school diploma meant that students had mastered basic skills." (Archibold, 2) ". . . an educated high school grad must read, compute, persevere, organize and problem- solve well enough not just to attend college, but to graduate from college." (Archibold, 3) "'Why do students at Fordham Prep study Latin and Greek? It's useless.' And I say it frees the mind and the heart." (Archibold, 3)
Education discourse -- word list for this topic --
sound, basic education - think critically - basic skills - commitment - ability to adapt
MISSING WORKS CITED ENTRY
What does this essay identify as problems in American education?
The problems identified are the differing opinions as to what a basic education includes. No matter what the stance, it seems "there is also seemingly overwhelming agreement that many people are not getting [a proper education]." (Archibold)
Unfortunately, "there is no one meter to measure whether you have received a sound basic education" (Archibold)
What does this essay suggest American education should focus on?
There is obviously some debate to "what [exactly] a sound, basic education comprises." (Archibold)
However, "there is a general view that besides practical skills like making change or reading a map, such an education should include critical reasoning and the ability to form judgments and opinions independently." (Archibold)
Not to mention having some level of "intellectual curiosity about learning more and exploring the possibilities of science and the understanding you get from literature and the arts." (Silvers)<<<WHEN A WRITER QUOTES ANOTHER PERSON IN HIS OR HER ARTICLE, STATE WHO'S ACTUALLY TALKING IN THE NOTES, AND IN THE PARENTHESIS, ADD QTD. IN _____ (BLANK IS AUTHOR OF SOURCE) FOR QUOTED IN
EXAMPLE
GERALD GRAFF BELIEVES THAT "TEXT, TEXT, TEXT" (QTD. IN ARCHIBOLD)
The importance of that independent thought extends even to people called to jury duty-the highest civic duty to society. It is "where life experience and practical intelligence can be more important than formal education." (Degrasse)
VERY GOOD START HERE -- GOOD JOB OF TAKING OUT SPECIFIC QUOTES.
How does this essay suggest American education could be improved?
One suggestion is to "emphasize the ability to think and argue rather than cramming minds with a lot of facts". (Graff)
In addition, a reoccurring train of thought in this essay is to be able to "instill ‘a love of lifelong learning'". (LeClerc)
To have teachers that can motivate and turn students "onto more education, more learning" is "the single greatest contribution an educator can make". (LeClerc)
In the end, receiving a high school diploma "should not be the final measure of a student's success." (Goldstein)
"The first 16 or 20 years [of formal schooling] is a prelude. . . .you have to have the ability to adapt to rapidly evolving change" (LeClerc) requiring the critical thinking skills many seem to think would cure the educational gap.
Connections to previous readings
N/A
Vivid examples/quotes/statistics in this reading
''A hundred years ago, the question for the jury was did he steal the horse or didn't he.. . . Nowadays people need to be able to understand DNA evidence a la the O. J. Simpson trial.'' (Sobol)
''It's knowing what you don't know. . . the skills of critical thought.'' (Botstein)
''a good education teaches you how to ask a question.'' (Botstein)
''You need to train the intelligence more than was the case in an agrarian society. We don't clear forest and lay railroad track. We perform complex operations on a computer. You could be comfortable with a lower standard in that older world of my father and grandfather's time. You can't be comfortable with that now in my time.'' (Sobol)
"A survey of 450 employers conducted two years ago for the New York City Partnership and Chamber of Commerce found that only 10 percent of respondents thought a high school diploma meant that students had mastered basic skills." (Archibold)
Education discourse -- word list for this topic
Fundamental education
Education standards
Teaching methods
Critical thinking
Independent thought
Continuing education
Moore, Michael "Idiot Nation" Rereading America. Boston, New York 2004. September 10, 2008.
ANTHOLOGY: FOR THE CORRECT METHOD OF CITING THIS SOURCE, FOLLOW THIS EXAMPLE FROM THE <http://lib.ocean.edu/the_source> CITING SOURCES SITE
Moore, Michael. "Idiot Nation." Rereading America. Eds. Gary Colombo, Robert Cullen, and Bonnie Lisle. Boston: Bedford, 2004. 153-170.
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What does this essay identify as problems in American education?
1. Television: Americans spend almost fourteen times more of their year watching TV than reading. He states, "99 hours a year an average American adult spends reading a book -- compared with 1,460 hours watching television." ( Moore , 154)
2. Ignorant leaders: Moore provides numerous examples of leaders who revel in their ignorance. For example, Bush confusing Africa for a nation and proudly proclaiming his C average GPA. "As Americans, we have quite a proud tradition of being represented by ignorant high-ranking officials." ( Moore , 155)
3. Poverty/Lack of Funding: Not only are some schools neglected of funding, but Moore explains how they are deliberately rejected the funding our kids deserve. He tells us that President Bush cut federal spending on libraries by 19 percent. Children are reading from outdated books, because our government has greater "priorities" than educating our youth. He says, ". . . we somehow can't find the money to pay a starting teacher more than 31,900 a year. And we act surprised when we can't get results." ( Moore , 161) Moore later adds, "For kids who are exposed to books at home, the loss of a library is sad. But for kids who come from environments where people don't read, the loss of a library is a tragedy. . . " ( Moore , 162)
GOOD POINT ON PICKING UP ON THE FUNDING
4. The Blame Game: Moore makes accusers eat their own words. His phone consultation with Fred Barnes (who had been mocking America 's youth on national television) proved that Barnes himself had no idea how to answer the same questions he said today's teenagers couldn't answer. "You gladly hawk your "wisdom" to hundreds of thousands of unsuspecting citizens, gleefully scorning others for their ignorance. Yet you and your guests know little or nothing yourselves." ( Moore , 156)
I HAVE TO ADMIT -- I LOVE THAT HE CALLED BARNES' BLUFF
He also defends the teachers, who evidently need the support. With politics such as Chester Finn verbally slicing their dedication to pieces, Moore quickly responds, ". . . the vast majority are dedicated educators who have chosen a profession that pays them less than what some of their students earn selling Ecstasy, and for that sacrifice we seek to punish them." ( Moore , 160)
What does this essay suggest American education should focus on?
While Moore spends more time making corrections rather than suggestions, he does propose that students maintain their individuality by finding leaks in the system. He advises students to make their own clubs and newspapers to let the school (and possibly the rest of the public) know what is actually going on from a student's point of view. <<<NEED TO CITE THE PAGE NUMBERS OF THIS SUMMARIZED INFORMATION
GOOD ON THIS POINT ABOUT MAINTAINING INDIVIDUALITY -- SOMETHING GATTO SUGGESTS TOO (THOUGH ONLY BY SHOWING THE RESULT OF BAD SCHOOL POLICIES)
Also, without actually saying it, he insinuates that Americans should spend more time reading books and financially supporting libraries than watching television and creating bombs. He hints that our leaders of education should put a higher value on the learning experience rather than ". . . turning the students into billboards" ( Moore , 166) by becoming the lab rats of corporate America .
Connections to previous readings
The only readings I can relate this essay to offhand are articles from the newspaper (and other current events articles), and comics similar to the ones presented in the textbook. My local paper (like Michael Moore's essay) is constantly informing the public of the current status of students (and the financial status of the school itself) from elementary grades and up. There are endless updates that (proving Moore 's approach to lousy teacher's pay to be accurate) we are in desperate need of teachers -- teachers for any and every subject.
Vivid examples/quotes/statistics in this reading
"99 hours a year an average American adult spends reading a book -- compared with 1,460 hours watching television." ( Moore , 154)
"As Americans, we have quite a proud tradition of being represented by ignorant high- ranking officials." ( Moore , 155)
". . . we somehow can't find the money to pay a starting teacher more than 31,900 a year. And we act surprised when we can't get results." ( Moore , 161)
"For kids who are exposed to books at home, the loss of a library is sad. But for kids who come from environments where people don't read, the loss of a library is a tragedy. . . " ( Moore , 162)
"High school, as we all know, is some sort of sick, sadistic punishment. . . What other explanation could there be for those four brutal years of degrading comments, physical abuse. . . " ( Moore , 159)
"Apparently the mayor and the school board [of New York City ] are experiencing with chaos theory -- throw five hundred poor kids into a crumbling building, and watch nature take its course!" ( Moore , 161)
GOOD -- THOUGH SOME OF THESE MAY ALSO WORK IN THE CATEGORIES ABOVE.
Education discourse -- word list for this topic
idiots - ignorant - deprived - irony