Thesis Statements and Topic Sentences Essay #1
There are two parts to a thesis statement:
- The thesis: in general the main point you're working with for the essay. In this case, what focus will you follow through Morris' essay?
- Your divisions: in general, the arguments or ideas you'll use to prove your thesis. For this essay, the divisions will probably be the examples that prove your thesis is valid.
A student was scratching his head in class saying "this is tough." Yes and no. Like any college assignment, it takes time and thought. It will also probably take several drafts to get the ideas and the wording into shape.
Rough Draft
Errol Morris, of the "New York Times," tries to show people that everyone tends to judge things by the way they look. Morris explains the difference between what a real smile looks like from what a fake smile looks like, how people automatically jump to conclusions and say they do not like something just by looking at what is on the outside, and how pictures can portray something completely different from what they were supposed to.
Revision
Errol Morris, of the New York Times, shows that people tend to judge things by the way they look. He does this by explaining the difference between a real and fake smile, showing how easily people jump to conclusions, and illustrating that pictures can easily mislead.
Rough Draft
In "The Most Curious Thing" Errol Morris suggests the military was violating the Geneva Conventions at the Abu Ghraib Prison, when a prisoner died during an interrogation. Unaccounted prisoners, abusive interrogation methods, and military officers obstructing justice, illustrate this.
Revision
In the blog, Morris suggests the military abused prisoners at the Abu Ghraib Prison through his description of the unaccounted prisoners, abusive interrogation methods, and official obstruction of justice.
Rough Draft
The author suggests that things are not always, what they seem to be. This is shown in the pictures in the article, the big cover-up at Camp Pozzi and the "Ghosts" that are in the interrogation prison but not accounted for.
Revision
The author suggests that things are not always what they seem to be. This is shown by the photographs, the cover-up of a murder at Camp Pozzi, and the unaccounted "Ghosts."
Topic Sentences
Thesis statements and topic sentences work together. Your thesis and divisions will determine your topic sentences and control your paragraphs.
Many readers are interested in making their essays "flow" better: the connection between thesis statements (particularly divisions) and topic sentences is the first step of achieving this.
In general, you'll use repetition of your division and thesis -- or synonyms -- in your topic sentences to keep readers (and yourself) focused. Consider the thesis and topic sentences below.
Thesis
The author suggests that things are not always what they seem to be. This is shown by the photographs, the cover-up of a murder at Camp Pozzi, and the unaccounted "Ghosts."
Topic sentences for above thesis
The story behind the photograph of Sabrina Harmon with the dead body of al-Jamadi shows that appearances can be deceiving.
In addition to the photographs, the cover-up of al-Jamadi's murder by Camp Pozzi officials hides the truth behind what really occurred in the shower room.
Finally, the “ghost” prisoners at the Abu Ghraib show that appearances can be deceiving.
Note that each topic sentence refers back to a specific division (and follows the order of the divisions) and mentions the thesis as well.
You should strive for a similar pattern in your own essay.
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